For Christmas, I'd really love to have some solid fabrics. I've been thinking about you and your circumstances Santa. I know it's not nice to say, but I think that you and Mrs. Claus need a bit of a clothing makeover. Your elves are also looking like they need some new uniforms. I don't know if it's global warming, or the pollution in the snow, but things are looking rather dingy. If you sent me this coloured jelly roll I could definitely outfit a few of your elves in crisp and bright new red and green. Hey...I could even shake things up for you and Mrs. Claus and make things more tropical in your summer outfits!
I hope you're not offended by my letter Santa. I'm just trying to help you out a bit, since you're always helping all of the children around here. It's time you get a little something back!
p.s. If you go into the pantry, there's a little extra irish something to add to your hot chocolate.